Okay. Last time, on Planeteers! Eui-Tae managed to convince his mother, with a good amount of weedling from his little sister, Jae-Eun, to let him go with you guys. And her. For a scholarship that doesn't exist. Wow, Ziegfried's gonna be paying *that* one through the nose. The session opens with you guys sitting in the woods. It's dark, but hey, you've got a couple tents. And a campfire. Ziegfried, actually, went off to find more firewood. Does this have any bearing on what was going on? Probably not, but you're not even pondering it, anyway. Must be a dream sequence, or the enterance to a really crappy horror movie, or maybe it's just because it's Halloween and your GM's on a sugar high. ... Man, it sure is dark. I really hope this isn't a dream sequence. Tyler ellipses, but the GM calmly ignores her. (Or shakily, since she's still on that sugar high.) Session Start. (HA!) (Well, at least we know who'll make it out alive. *glances over to Fatima*) (The person with no last name dies first! *checks* OH wait.) ( ... ) What a lovely night it is! Here in this undisclosed country we happened to land in! * Jose is sitting very close to the fire. He puts his hands near the flames and absorbs the radiant heat. * Fatima sighs but doesn't seem bothered by the chill, for some reason. "See the world, she had said." * Eui-Tae is looking up at the stars. Well, if he can see them anyways. * Jose looks at his ring. At least we will never have to worry about matches. ( Oh boy. A friend of mine who's in Japan is suddenly inviting a bunch of people to chat. I apologize in advance if I seem distracted. ) (rgr.) ('sokay, Ard's just gonna goof off today anyways, ;) ) (Wheee! Sugar!) (Ard, put the orange soda down, and no one gets hurt...) * Tyler hops to her feet and wanders over to the edge of the woods. "Boy, sure is a whole lot of nothing out here. They need a video store or something." (Only you. ^_^) (Must... eat... all... the... Milky Ways...) Tyler, roll mind. ^^ * Eui-Tae pulls out a laptop and starts connecting to B.net. 2d6 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Tyler (2d6) and gets 4. Eui-Tae can't connect! NOOOOO! (Haw haw.) * Eui-Tae folds up his laptop. "Aw, horseshit." Nature never sleeps. If you look carefully you can watch all the nocturnal animals wandering around. (Do we have a cooler?) (With soda?) (And sandwiches?) (And ice cream?) (Yes.) (Except the ice cream's melted. NOOOOO!) (This is... THE FUTURE! Of course coolers have ice cream.) * Jose grabs a cold one from the cooler. * Tyler snaps her fingers. "I remember seeing a town a few miles down the road. Nature is starting to get a little too natural for my taste. Who's walking with me to see all the blessed electricity?" * Eui-Tae nods. "Electricity good. (Do we really wanna split up again? Yes! :) ) (Of course we do!) (Yes, split up in the horror session, very good.) (You *know* it's a horror session when I melt the ice cream.) * Fatima sighs. "It makes one wonder, does it not? Cybele charged us with saving the environment... but 'roughing it' does not match my desires quite fully." (Virgin count!) Well, it'd be nice if we roughed up the locals a bit. (You all have seen Scream, you know the rules.) * Eui-Tae smacks Jose. "You know what happened last time you tried that." Dumbass... * Jose rubs his head. "Yeah..." Yeah, whatever. Just catch up with me. * Tyler sashays on down the road. ( "What's my favorite scary Turner cartoon? 'The New Adventures of johnny Quest'. no, really." ) * Jose catches up. ( The new adventures of Johnny Quest? That show was pretty bad.) * Jose looks up at the sky. (Cloud cover?) (Aurora Borealis?) * Eui-Tae gets up and chases after Tyler. "Don't leave me without electricity!" * Fatima walks with the cooler swinging between her hands like a picnic basket. It's a shame this is THE FUTURE, or she'd hum something from 'Into the Woods'. Okay, so *are* you guys splitting up? (Oh, heck. Why not hum it? She can always be an oldies fan. ^^) (It is... THE FUTURE!) * Jose yells back at the camp. "Fatima! You want to come with?" (THE FUTURE!) (*THUNDERCLAP!* THE FUTURE *dun dun dun!*) (Well, we split up enough to let Ziggy wander off by his lonesome. ^_-) * Fatima glances at Jose. "I am, in fact, following. Just walking a bit behind." She continues to swing the cooler. "o/` Anything can happen in the woods..." * Tyler sets a quick pace. Her heavy boots means she's tromping more heavily than anyone her size has any right to. You walk. And walk, and walk, and walk. Mmm, the lure of electricity. Awareness checks! 2d6-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Eui-Tae (2d6-4) and gets 3. * Pilot has joined #planet * Pilot is now known as Atom 2d6-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Jose (2d6-2) and gets 8. 2d6-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Tyler (2d6-4) and gets 1. 2d6-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Fatima (2d6-2) and gets 4. ( I mad eit! I made it! Jose has to die instead, HAHA! ) o/~ (See ya later Jose!) (Ha ha!) (No!!!) The more paranoid among you (read: everyone but Jose) hears shuffling behind you! Unfortunately, Jose is trailing the group. Why? Because I felt like it. (So, is this like the Simpsons Halloween episodes that are entirely out of continuity, right?) * Jose walks along without noticing anything. (My god... I'm cracking up over here.) (You could think of it that way, yes. ^^) * Eui-Tae walks along and notices something. "Will you quit that Jose?" Quit the what? * Tyler frowns a bit and speeds up. Clomp clomp clomp goes her boots on the pine needles/leaves/dead grass/what sort of climate are they in? * Fatima blinks and stops humming. "Hmm. Maybe Ziegfried decided to follow?" SHe peers back, trying to pierce the darkness behind Jose. It's a temperate zone! The super bowl shuffle, that's what. (we are the bears shufflin' crew!) (Shuffle on down, doin' it for you!) (we're not here to start some trouble, we're just here for the superbowl shuffle!) (Bears suck...) (We're so bad that you know we're good, blowin' your minds like you knew we would!) Jose, give me another awareness check. ^^ 2d6-2 (Sucks to be you Jose. ;) ) * Dicesuke throws the bones for Jose (2d6-2) and gets 3. ( You people are incredibly insane. ) (Damn, I wanted to see blood.) Jose realizes there's something... RIGHT BEHIND HIM! * Jose turns around! (Ah! Its a... tree.) It's big. *Real* big. And gray. And smells bad. Jose, do an unarmed defense (grapple) roll for me, if you would. 2d6 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Jose (2d6) and gets 2, a CRITICAL SUCCESS!!! "My momma always said, you gotta take the good with the bad. Here's some good." (Well...) (Wow.) ( "Impressive, Snake. You're as good as they said." ) (Take that Big Foot!) (HYAH!!!) The thing lunges for him! Jose, as if it were an act of God, deftly steps aside. It goes sprawling on the ground, face first. * Thing has joined #planet * Jose jumps back in astonishment. "What the!" * Eui-Tae runs up and puts his foot on the thing's face. "That ought to show it." * Fatima turns around. Blinks. Blinks again. Tilts head. Says "Oh, my" like a dazed autistic. (Err... head) * Thing twitches and starts climbing back to its feet, even though it fails one two three... and then Eui-Tae puts a foot on its head. "Ooooooooowwww." * Tyler turns and blinks many, many times. * Jose readies his bow and aims for the thing. Well, huh. What 'cho tryin' foo * Fatima blinks again, then snaps out of it. "Hold on just a moment!" Is anyone carrying a, y'know, FLASHLIGHT in this situation? ^^ (Of course not.) (Idea!) * Eui-Tae pulls out a flashlight, with Energizer batteries! (Whoo, I love you guys. ^_^) (Wanted to use my ring as torch...) (That woulda been interesting. Just set whole forest on fire...) (Go for it, I'll use the wind to make it go even faster!) (Well, then you'd be making your *own* horror story. Imagine how angry Cybele would be. ;P) ( And I'll... uh... warn the animals! Or something. ) (Cybele: "JOSE!!! YOU BURNED DOWN A WHOLE FOREST!") (No, tell them to stay for dinner. ;) ) * Thing twitches again, seems to consider pushing Eui-Tae off, and then decides against it and just lies there. Someone poke it. (^^;) * Tyler storms up and kicks it in the head. * Eui-Tae looks at the Thing. "Guys... I bet this guy could get off of him if he wanted me to..." * Fatima frowns. "There is no reason to *shoot* it or *poke* it." She walks over next to Eui-Tae and looks down. "Do you speak or understand?" TYler! Poke it! Not kick it! Hey! Smelly thing! What the hell's going on here, huh? * Thing opens one eye to look at Fatima. "Buuuuurger?" it asks hopefully. ( It's... Larry 2000 from that ep of "Time Squad"? ) (Fatima, grab the cooler and run run run!) * Eui-Tae looks at the Thing and doesn't look the bit surprised... "I think I know who this thing is..." * Fatima looks a bit taken aback. She digs in the cooler and produces a creamsicle. "Err, no. Orange." Zeig, did you get turned into a Zombie by the Government again? A hairy zombie? * Thing considers that, then grabs the orange and sits up. Eui-Tae just falls off of him. Well, that explains why it doesn't want to get up. * Fatima wahs and recoils. "Well, then." * Tyler kneels down next to it, looking quite suspicious. Her hair glows... oh, let's say, green in the moonlight. She took the time to dye it before leaving the Island. * Eui-Tae falls off the thing. "Yup, that's Zeig all right." * Thing stuffs the creamsicle in its mouth. "Yuuuuuum." * Atom has quit IRC (Quit: ) ( It can't be bad. It likes creamsicles. ) * Thing is now known as ZombieZieg (What about pie though?) ( Pie is irrelevant. ) (Who doesn't like pie?) Ziegfried... what did you eat this time? * ZombieZieg thinks about this very hard. Well, this is interesting. I wonder if his nose will fall off any time soon. Eating random meat on the ground is NOT perfectably acceptable! * ZombieZieg slurps the creamsicle some more and says around it, "Buuuuuurger." * Tyler leans in close to watch. (Without pie, there is no honor - Shakspeare.) I think it wants a burger. You think they will have a burger joint in town? Or maybe I should call it a he now. I bet, either that or a Kentucky Fried Taco Hut. * Tyler walks over to Fatima and grins. "I think it's a good look for the guy, don't you?" * ZombieZieg gets to his feet and starts shuffling off towards town. Now that you guys are looking for it, he really *does* look like Zieg, just... gray and smelly and stupider and drooling. (Man, and that's an improvement. :P ) We better follow... (Isn't it? ^_^_v) * Fatima glances at Tyler with an absent look on his face. "He is much quieter this way. I would be lying if I said it was displeasing." So you like the Zombified Zieg? * Tyler grins at her, then follows with a light elbow nudge in the ribs. "I knew I liked you." * ZombieZieg finishes the ice cream and starts chewing on the popsicle stick. * Fatima considers this briefly, oofing. "It is a question of which cactus has shorter thorns, Eui-Tae." * ZombieZieg is one intelligent zombie, since he can eat and walk at the same time. ^_^_v So, how do we turn him back... if we really wanted to. So pick the lesser of the two evils... Like do I vote for Gore or Bush? (Yes, even seventy years in the future, the Gore and Bush family lines still won't just go away.) * Fatima is actually sort of glad that the zombie has the cooler. She is weak and it is heavy. "Holy water? An exorcism?" She considers this. "The Qua'ran is decidedly unhelpful in the dezombification arena, I am afraid." (They just moved to Korea. ^^) I've watched monster movies. I know what to do. (Hack off his head with a chainsaw!) Yeah, we need to get to a medic. Lets go to town and maybe we find someone there. * Tyler stomps into the underbrush, then returns in a minute with a broken stick. She hefts the rather dangerous-looking end. "I'm very sorry, Zieg. If you were yourself, I know you'd think this was for the best." ( Yeah, currently "graft shotgun to arm" is not on my list of options, unless said shotgun summons Captain Holiness. ) Now hold still and tell me which vital organ you want punctured. * ZombieZieg is eating a sandwich out of the cooler. He doesn't seem to notice Tyler as he shambles along. ( "Bible!" "Choir!" "Wafer!" "Cossack!" "Wine!" "By your vestments combined, I am CAPTAIN CATHOLIC!" ) Oh, I remember this part... it's from when Zombies attack part 53! (Aah, Fatima has figured out my not-plan!) * Tyler frowns and takes an experimental jab between his shoulderblades. * ZombieZieg is jabbed. He doesn't seem to care. * Eui-Tae pulls out a pocket knife. "You might want to try this." * Fatima puts a hand to her chin. "We do not have zombies in the middle east. What are they supposed to be like?" * ZombieZieg reaches back and grabs the stick, then uses it to clean his ear. What a hygenic zombie. Ew. He got my stake all earwaxy. Dude, you wanted blood, quit complaining. Blood. Not earwax. * Tyler considers. "I wonder if I could get a priest to bless my ring. Instant holy water!" Earwax is easier to clean up though. * Fatima blinks. "I do not profess knowledge of the undead, but aren't stakes for vampires?" (Tyler, that rocks.) That'd be nice. (^_^_v) You'd be surprised at how often just sticking sharp stuff into things kills them. You near town! It's a nice deal, with a video store and a creepy looking motel and a creepier looking abandoned mansion and a small church and a few houses and a video arcade. Arcade! Oh yes, and a fuel station. How could I forget the fuel station? Games? Maybe... I dunno... helping Ziegfried out may be nice. (Don't you mean Supply Depot?) * ZombieZieg notices the arcade. "Mmmm. Dance Dance Revoluuuuuution." *shamble* I'll help him out! I'll do it! You guys go do whatever. * Tyler grins. It's a slightly... feral grin. OH yes, and a Kentucky Fried Taco Hut. Maybe throwing a bunch of Holy Water on him will do the trick. * Eui-Tae watches Zeig shamble off. "Looks like Zeig has the right idea." * Tyler runs over to the church. * Jose chases after the sprinting Tyler. * Eui-Tae watches Tyler run off. "I think I'd better go that way." He runs after Tyler. * Fatima walks along sedately, She's actually enjoying this as a sort of academic excursion. "Is that wise? I thought holy water was for purifying the undead? Please forgive me, I have a much different cultural background." * Tyler arrives in the church and sees what it looks like! (Cue the heads turning over to the GM.) * Eui-Tae (Turns his head to the GM.) You all reach the church! It's... a church. There's a belltower and Jesus on the cross and all. Likely Catholic. Heading in, you can see that it's very well maintained, if small. Quaint, even. * Fatima looks around. "How lovely!" * Jose searches for the holy water. * Tyler pokes around a bit, calling out "Hello?" every now and then in her hunt for a priest. * ZombieZieg is now known as Priest * Eui-Tae observes the church. "Okay, come out wherever you are. You can't hide from us! Well... maybe you can, but that won't help you for long!" * Fatima eyes Eui. "Who would be hiding from us in a *church*?" All we need is some holy water and a exorcism. That is all. * Priest looks up from his prayers. "Hmm? What's this now?" Hi, yeah. We've got a zombie. Really? Staking him didn't work, so we figure it's up to you now. (*kicks the window demon*) Really? Unless you want me to try to stake him again. I could. Really. And I s'pose he's chasing you right now, eh? * Eui-Tae shakes his head. "No, he's at the arcade." * Priest is speaking with a light Irish accent. Irish Roman Catholic priest. This really is a horror show. No, he was headed for the arcade. We should stake him before he frightens anyone. Actually, he is a friend of ours... So maybe killing him isn't the main solution here. Hush. Let the man do his work. Wait wait wait, you're givin' me a heacache. * Fatima looks confused. "If he's a zombie, doesn't that mean he's already dead?" * Eui-Tae shrugs. "If we kill him, we might get another group member though." First y'say y'wanna kill the beastie, then y'say ya wanna save 'im. Can't have it both ways, kids. Yay! Let's do that! Kill him! Let's roll the dice! And really, I don't have much experience with zombies. Harmless critters, that. Usually give 'em a pack of brie and you'll be fine. * Tyler claps her hands together and looks rather girly. It's somewhat unsettling. The vampires, on the other hand... * Eui-Tae looks at Tyler. "You really don't like him, do you?" * Tyler raises an eyebrow. Damn, and here her stake's all earwaxy. Would you lose the earwax stick already? Its disgusting. (I didn't say anything about it.) (And he took it back in the woods.) (oop. Supposed to be in ()'s.) (/me slaps himself good.) (Good boy, we don't have to slap him around anymore. He does it himself.) (See, THERE is a well-trained man!) (Im slappy-trained.) So, vampires. Fun town you've got here. Oh, sure is. Go out an' enjoy yourselves, yeah? Lemme know when you get into trouble. Is it perchance called... Ainavlesnart? Sure thing. * Tyler sticks out her hand towards the man. "But first..." * Priest blinks at Eui-Tae. "Don't be daft, boy. That's the country." * Eui-Tae nods. "Oh yeah." (Is the town called... Sunnydale? :P) (Yes. But you didn't ask!) (Haw.) I'm sorry to interrupt, and this may sound slightly nasty, but... COULD SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT IN THE NAME OF ALLAH IS GOING ON? * Fatima pauses. "Pardon my disrespect in your church, Father." * Eui-Tae looks at Fatima. "Wow, she's getting better every minute. Next thing you know she'll be asking people to shoot her... Like Jose over there." * Priest turns as he hears screaming and a big black thing crashes through one the stained glass windows, followed by a blonde chick with a crossbow. He sighs. "'S no problem, lass. But I've got a bit of a situation to take care of." (Oh, I *hope* Fatima doesn't turn into Relena.) * Tyler blinks. * Eui-Tae blinks. * Jose stares at the chick with the bow. So she's into bows too eh? * Tyler edges along the walls of the church towards the commotion. * Priest walks up to the people (at least, one of them's a people), and starts talking to them. The black thing snarls and vanishes, and the chick rubs her forehead like she has a headache. Then she jumps back out the window. (Tyler has no survival instinct. She'd be the best friend who dies halfway through in any decent horror flick. :P) (Yes.) * Fatima tilts her head. "Well, yes, that's certainly true." She rubs her chin, oblivious to the carnage. "Perhaps we should be using our powers to help them?" She thinks this over. "No, vampires are known for summoning wolves. It would not help my case." (However, this is far from a decent horror flick.) (I don't think decent horror flicks are allowed to reference DDR.) ( Right now it feels like Zombies Ate My Neighbors, and I want a balloon clown decoy and a bazooka. ) Who was that? (Or Kentucky Fried Taco Hut?) (You just need to look for them, Fatima! ^^) A chick with a crossbow and an undead army of evil shadows? Oh, this girl, fancies herself to be a vampire hunter. * Tyler snorts. Her clothes weren't nearly fashionable enough. Close enough. * Priest frowns. "Keeps breakin' the windows, though." (Yeah, they're just lying in store windows waiting for you to pick them up.) * Fatima hmms. "How do you replace them so quickly?" So, then. We do the hunting! Oh, we get plenty o' donations. You do? I'll be sure to take out any zombies plaguing your fair town. * Eui-Tae shrugs. "I didn't see any zombies other than Zieg though." Well, y'see... they're not really a plague. 'n fact, the arcade loves 'em. Good, then we can focus our efforts. And Zombies can be different from Vamps. Wait, what? The arcade loves vampires? No, no. Zombies. Who? Oh, well that makes MUCH more sense. * Priest nods. "'Course it does." ( ... ) * Fatima blinks, and rubs her chin. "Wait a minute. Father, are you saying... these are *video game zombies*?" Get the water guns! (Will they start dancing if Michael Jackson came in and started singing?) (Now that would make a horror session.) (I was about to ask that... Does the new DDR have a MJ song on it?) (Brrrrr.) Eh? No, we don't have any games starring zombies... I think. But they sure like their video games. And cheese. What about brains? ( ... ) Do you know any ways of changing them back to human? * Priest shrugs. "Holy water kills 'em. I s'pose if... hmm." He frowns. Right! So bless my ring, please. * Tyler sticks out her hand again. Why'd yer ring need a blessin', girl? * Eui-Tae (Pulls off his shoe. "Bless my shoe!" ) ( "Bless the sinks!" "What?" "JUST DO IT!" ) * Tyler opens her mouth, then realizes how weird the whole Planeteers spiel has been. "It's... been very, very bad." (More or less weird than video game playing, cheese eating zombies?) Then I could give it a confessional. (I think more. Spanky WAS in silver eyeliner.) Bad ring, bad ring! * Jose stares at his ring. (Err, less weird.) * Jose reminices... Well, you could, but it can't talk. * Priest chuckles. "You kids are loony. I tell you what. Bring your friend to me, and I'll see what I could do for 'im, yes?" * Fatima smiles. "That would be wonderful. If you would just supply us with some steel cable and a cordon of local police, we will be happy to." Eh, the station's down the street. If they're not busy dealin' with other things, I'm sure they'd be happy to help a fine (crazy) group such as yerselves. (@_@;) I will try to convice Ziggy to come over here. I may need some help "convincing" him. (*snerk* Trick or treat! ... we're cold!) (Heh. ^^) Probably the best item we could use is a burger. Okay, fine. No ring blessing. Where do you keep the chalice of holy water, then? Yeah, with cheese, lots of cheese. Let's get a platter of those first. The plan should move itself from there. No, no, we don' just give out holy water so people can kill their zombie friends. Oh, you don't need to worry. He's not my friend. * Priest eyes Tyler. Yup, she doesn't like him. * Jose agrees. She's plotting against him so she will be the only pilot. Heh, that's fine with me. He does make some good burgers though. I AM the only pilot. He's just the other person who tries to fly the plane. Ah, I see. Well, I still can't- * Priest stops as there's a flash of lightning, and the lights in the church go dim. He sighs and wanders off, probably to try to fix it. * Tyler slips off in search of holy water. * Eui-Tae pulls out his flashlight. (No, don't gooooo!) Tyler, the fool that she is, SPLITS UP! (No! Survival! Instinct!) * Jose points out his ring and... wait... maybe not a good idea. And Jose develops COMMON SENSE! This is badly written. (You can say that again.) That's it. I'm going to the arcade. Arcade sounds good. * Jose heads out of the church and towards the arcade. * Fatima sits down in a pew and starts flipping through the Bible. "I'll just wait for Tyler, then." * Eui-Tae goes along with Jose. (pew... that stinks.) Fatima waits at the church, Tyler wanders off for holy water. Eui- Tae and Jose go for the arcade. We shall follow them. As they go, there's another crash of lightning! And a boom of thunder! And an ominous voice! * Priest is now known as Voice I am the terror... that flaps in the night! What are you trying to do now Cybele? I am the- hey, don't get ahead of me, kid. * Voice doesn't sound the least bit like Cybele, anyhow. Something about being male and deep and spooky. * Tyler hmms and dips a finger into the chalice of water she--literally-- stumbled into. "Does this feel holy? Hmmmmm...." Let me guess... You are the worker unit that never dies? Tyler can't tell! * Fatima looks at her ring. "Do *you* know who this is?" Is she addressing Cybele? * Jose scratches his head. The ring shines all pretty-like, and the GM starts going nuts. Fatima and Tyler into #planet2 The worker that never dies? Hell no. That sucks. No, it's a real pain in the butt. The worker never dies, and just runs around building farms. It makes it a pain to win since you have to waste all their buildings. Can you just shut up for a sec here, Kid? You're throwing me off my mojo. I'll throw your mojo. A dark, winged shape moves through the shadows towards you! The voice moves with it. "I'll suck your blood!" So, you're a vampire now? Man, that is so passe. * Voice is now known as Vampire * Jose aims his ring at the vampire. "Suck on this!" * Vampire pounces on Eui-Tae. "Want me to prove it?" * Eui-Tae looks at the all-concealing shadows. "No demonstration required, really." Eui UTTERLY FAILS to move out of the way! * Jose takes steady aim to not his Eui-Tae and yells "Fire!" Rollin' for Jose o/~ No Jose, do- (You missed. DR it?) (Yes please.) Jose blasts the vampire with fire. And... *roll* Eui-Tae gets hit, too. * Vampire screams and smolders. It's hard to get a good look at him, since he's on fire and all. * Jose readies his arrow and aims for the vampire. * Eui-Tae tries to roll to put out the flames. "Geeze, you had to hit me too." * Vampire lets go of Eui-Tae and stop drops and rolls! (Stop drop roll! Stop drop roll!) (Man... Maybe I will develop the Fire Arrow Tech someday!) (Gee, ya think?) * Jose aims for the chest area and looses an arrow. * Vampire gets to his feet and snarls, jumping directly at Jose. (Great... Dicesuke had to bail on us.) (I'm rolling, hush.) (You just realized this?) Jose hits the vampire directly in the chest! It doesn't care. (Hrm... I guess an arrow does not count for a stake.) It barrels into Jose. (Nope.) * Eui-Tae gets up. "You bastard, I'm gonna knock you down! Wind!" ( Yeah, you get 'em, Garland. ) (Well, a wooden shaft would... if you hit it in the heart, not just the general chest area.) (Man, you're getting shafted. ;) ) * Jose falls back as he is tackled by the vamp. Jose and the vampire *both* get blasted into a wall. Lucky for Jose, the vampire offers a nice (if bony) cushion. Urk. @_@ (I'm choosing to believe that this vampire looks like Angel. So beat him up good, boys!) * Jose gets a few elbows in. Oof. Ow. Ugh. * Vampire keeps his hold on Jose, though, and spins, smacking the boy into the wall. It hurts. A lot. * Jose feels the pain. Grah! * Vampire drops him. "Stupid kid! Maybe I should just force you to watch the OJ Simpson trials over and over again instead of turning you into a vampire!" NO!!!! * Jose struggles to escape from the vamp's grab. Jose's been dropped. ;P * Eui-Tae aims his ring between Jose and the vampire. "Wind!" The wind pushes the vampire and Jose away from each other! * Jose tries to rip up a wooden board to act as a stake. Jose runs to a fence to do this. And he does it, though he manages to get splinters in his hands. * Vampire just frowns. "I have the sudden urge to eat chocolate cereal." (...) * Jose aims the pointy side at the vamp's heart. * Eui-Tae looks at him strangely. "If this is going the way I think it is..." Eui! Gimme some help to drive this wood FAST! * Eui-Tae tries to help Jose with the wood. * Vampire looks over at Jose. "Oh oh, that won't work!" Wings appear on his back and he jumps up, and he's up up and away! * Jose facepalms. * Eui-Tae points his ring at the vampire. "No you don't, Wind!" * Vampire flies easily away from the blast of wind, turning fully into a bat as he does so. He flaps towards the mansion (oooh). * Eui-Tae sighs. "Are you okay Jose?" * Jose stomps his foot and throws the oversized stake. I'm shaken up a bit, but I should live. Jose is not okay, and he throws a temper tantrum all at the same time! Why do I have a sudden urge for Angus? * Tyler comes out of the church, carrying a rather enormous crucifix between her and Fatima. "Point us at the vamps." * Eui-Tae points at the mansion. "That way." * Jose runs for the mansion. * Fatima tries to jog, but she is not only shouldering a cross, but also a bible. * Eui-Tae tries to pull Jose back. "Hold on fireboy." * Tyler heads for the mansion, big wooden weapon of vampire destruction on her shoulder. Before we go though... Let's go... without you running off. Here is an idea. * Jose grabs some old clothes and a vial of holy water. Hey everybody, hold on. Jose has an idea!. Where'd Jose get the vial of holy water, exactly? And since when did he become Velma? The vial is empty! Drats... * Eui-Tae looks at the empty vile. "No shit sherloc." Refill! (Diet Coke please!) (Sunk1st!) ( Fatima smash. ) (The boys beat up the vampire who humiliated them, while the girls found a pair of other, cuter vamps and made out with them for a while. Then the sun came up and their dates dusted. Oh well.) ( We need a good Scooby Doo ending. ) (It's Joe Barbera!) * Vampire is now known as Priest * Priest walks out of the church. "Hey now! No stealin' from the church!" No stealin' from anyone else, either, but especially no stealin' from the church! Oh, pin a rose on your nose, churchy. We need this. Don't the roses go on his toeses? * Fatima sighs. "Consider the replacement cost of one large cross, versus a continued nightmare of replacing stained-glass windows. In the long run, this is more cost-effective." * Eui-Tae nods. "That too. You can always "holy" some more water. * Priest frowns. "Really, children, you should have asked. Now give me back the cross, please." (LOL we are taking a CROSS from a CHURH.) Can't. We're on a mission from God. Well, a goddess. Maybe. * Fatima sighs, then points the ring on her finger at the priest. "This is not the cross you are looking for." Spirit of the earth? (Ha!) * Priest calmly ignores the ring. "Yer all daft. Now hand it over afore I have to call the police on you." I'll give you back the cross if you bless my ring. Aw. How about you come with us and help us defeat the vamps! A bless under a threat doesn't exactly work, lass. Where was that 'vampire hunter' anyways? We ran into a vamp just a few minutes ago and she was nowhere in sight. Oh, she went over that way. * Priest points at the mansion. Hey, if it's weak holy water, that's okay. I'll have a lot of it. * Eui-Tae looks at the mansion. "I knew it, they're in ca-hoots! The vampire and hunter pose as an excuse to use the mansion, which is really a cover for an underground smuggling ring!" * Priest grumbles. "Fine, fine, I'll bless yer ring. C'mere." Yay! * Tyler grins and drops her side of the cross, practically skipping over to him. (I love the FF4 world music.) * Priest grabs Tyler's right hand by the wrist and concentrates on the ring, saying a few words quietly in latin. This is followed by the sign of the cross. There, it's done. Give back the cross and the water and be on your way. Wonderful. It is quite heavy. * Tyler grins at him and does as ordered. * Eui-Tae helps Tyler... He just wants to waste that vampire. * Priest drags the cross back to the church, muttering something about retiring and working for the post office instead, because surely *that* would be less stressful. To the mansion! We should test my ring first, make sure it works. ...Where's Zieg? * Eui-Tae points at the arcade. * Tyler cackles and heads over there. * Eui-Tae follows Tyler. * Jose follows. And then the EVIL UNDEAD RISES UP and invites you all for tea and crumpets. Session End.